The War Inside
by the words left unsaid
Summary: 'She doesn't have the emotional strength to carry the weight of so many problems by herself. So there's that tiny part of her that just wants to go to the one person that she knows can do that for her. But every time, she stops herself, she reminds herself.' Caroline is trying to hold everyone together, but she's barely keeping it together herself. Set after 4x15.


**Word Count:** 1,367

**Disclaimer:** I don't claim to own The Vampire Diaries, but I certainly wish I did.

**Note: **So this is set after 4x15.

* * *

She sits on her bedroom floor, legs crossed, trying to block out all thought. Thinking it would be a good way to take her mind off of everything, she'd gotten all her old photos out.

It wasn't.

Every picture she owns captures a happy moment, and she'd had a lot of those. Happiness doesn't really happen anymore though – its stress on top of stress, pinning and holding everyone together, just about managing to pull through the days.

The problem – which she hates to admit – is that she just can't look after everyone without someone looking after her; she doesn't have the emotional strength to carry the weight of so many problems by herself. So there's that tiny part of her that just wants to go to the one person that she knows can do that for her. But every time, she stops herself, she reminds herself.

Right now is one of those times.

Because Elena isn't okay, not by a longshot, so Stefan and Damon aren't okay – they're busy trying to _fix fix fix_. Because Bonnie is far from fine, she's spiralling off into the deep end and as much as Caroline wants to get through to her she physically _can't_. Any way that Matt can help is reserved for Elena, too, which is fine – it is.

Caroline hasn't even had time to grieve. She hasn't shed one tear and she knows that that's wrong but what happens if she breaks, too? She's too worried that she's the glue and without it nothing sticks, and everything will fall apart. _You're stronger now, _she reminds herself, but it doesn't seem true enough. And it's so hard to stop herself from going to him, from calling on him, from even _thinking _about him.

It absolutely riddles her with guilt.

Attraction is something she cannot deny that she has for him, but what she _can_ deny is that it's something more because it _can't _be. He's done so much to her – he's done so much to everyone, how could she forget it and put that in the past? There's that awful part of her that wishes that she could, because when she's with him she sees that he is not a monster, not truly. It's like the person that does those awful things and the person that's in love with her are just two completely different people.

All she has seemed to do for this past day is censor her thoughts, because the things she thinks are too bad to even think, which she knows doesn't make any sense. She's afraid something will happen, because it's so easy to let herself slip around him. It would be going against her moral code – being with Klaus, but why? They've all done bad things, and she's done things she never thought she'd do in her eighteen years of life, so she can't possibly imagine what she could do after one-thousand lonely years of life.

Picking up her phone, she just stares at it, trying to coax herself out of calling.

"Caroline." That distinctive accent rings through the room.

Doesn't matter, apparently, the avoidance is clearly over.

"Why are you in my house Klaus? Get out!" she says rather half-heartedly, hating herself for being so relieved that he is standing in front of her.

"We haven't spoken in a few days, and I've heard all that's been happening. I won't stay long, promise." And he flashes that innocent smile, and he looks so strong that she just wants to pour her heart out to him because she knows that he won't break under the pressure of it all like she might, because he's lived through just about everything.

She tries her hardest to look angry, and as if she's considering kicking him out – she wants to, in her head, really. But her heart? He needs to stay. She _needs_ him to stay. She nods quickly, forcing a tight smile. "I'm fine," she mutters, still nodding her head and smiling probably too maniacally.

Klaus clasps his hands together, taking seemingly calculated steps towards her bed, and then he takes a seat next to her – not too close, but not too far away. Exactly the right place. "Fine?" he questions, his eyes telling her that it's okay to continue.

"Yeah, fine, I've been trying to arrange Jeremy's funeral, the wake, cheerleading practices, letting everyone know about the death, and I've got this project, I've just got a lot on my plate-" she stutters just slightly as she tries to swallow the lump in her throat. She really doesn't want to cry right now – she can't be vulnerable, not with Klaus.

He nods, replying, "You don't have to be the one fixing everything, you know that don't you Caroline?"

But no, she doesn't know that because it's not true. Who's going to fix things if she isn't? Taking deep breaths and just trying to calm herself slightly, she notices his hand on her leg. It's not in a sexual way though, just comforting. And it's nice, because she was right, but it's bad, because she was right – because he can look after her when no one else can. "Erm, everyone's just got a lot to think about so I'm just making sure it gets done-"

"-Don't worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow will worry about itself, love. You need to look after yourself."

Subconsciously she moves closer to him, like he's her light for once and she's the fly so it's the other way round this time. The problem with avoiding him is that it's made her think more about him, and it's made things clearer, and it makes it harder yet easier to be here with him right now. "Of course I can look after myself."

"I'm not saying you can't. Just remember to remember yourself, because they're all going to be okay in the end – we're immortal, Caroline, and time heals all wounds eventually, I can tell you that much. You can't do this all by yourself," he says sincerely, having inched even closer to her by this point.

"I'll be fine, really-"

Klaus' eyes move from the locking they've remained in with Caroline's, to the floor and the scattered pictures that lay upon it. He picks one of her, Elena and Bonnie up, holding it in front of her face. "You're fine, are you? Because I'm not sure you can be fine without these two."

As she looks at the picture for a few tense seconds, she finally feels herself rip as a stray tear slips down her face. So she turns to face the ground, away from Klaus' hard stare. Her body shakes as she tries to hold back the tears that she really doesn't want, and he watches her, shifting closer.

They both sit in silence for many minutes, the tension looming over them.

"I'll leave," he says eventually, squeezing her arm uncharacteristically.

She knows she should make him go, but she's just about reaching breaking point and she doesn't want to be there all by herself. The war is still inside of her, but for now, one side prevails. "No. Stay," she says strongly, taking a deep breath and wiping her eyes.

He looks at her as if to ask if she's sure, and she nods resolutely, "Please."

So without words, he takes his shoes off and sits on the bed next to her as she lies against it. "You need to sleep."

"No, I just need a minute – I've got to call a funeral service back –" she argues.

"It can wait."

And she ends up actually being able to stop thinking, which is what she's been trying to do for days. She manages to sleep peacefully, something she hasn't been able to do for days. So when she wakes up in the early hours of the morning in Klaus' arms the war inside finally stops, and she sees the most clearly she ever has that things are not so black and white, that help is help, understanding is understanding, and love is love.

As he stares up at the wall, not moving an inch so as not to wake her, she surprises him as she presses her lips against his.

* * *

**AN- **I found this situation quite hard to characterize, but I think I did alright, so I hope you guys enjoyed this! Please don't forget to review and favourite lovelies. :) x


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